WILLIAM JAY SMITH | The
Straw Market
|
Therry Steinhardt, Jake Wheeler, and Ann Jespersen
The Straw Market, Hollins College, 1966 |
ACT II
(The Headlight Bar on
the Via Tornabuoni one afternoon in early May. Everything looks much
the
same except that it is all much
darker. The bead curtain has been pushed aside, and a heavy door
is closed in its place. Umbrellas can be seen on the Via Tornabuoni
and in the
corner of the bar.
GLADYS DAVOS, MRS. WEDGWOOD
DAVOS, AND WILSON BRUSH are all again at their table.
The COWBOY is seated below
the iron kettle as before, guitar in hand. At another table, as before,
MRS. WADDLE, LIVIA GADDES GLATINI, and
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO.
At their same table downstage, WAVERLY THORNE and HILDA DONEAPPLE.
Before the Curtain rises,
the COWBOY is heard singing:
It’s raining in Florence;
It’s coming down in torrents,
It’s raining in Florence.
It’s raining through the valley
On every street and alley
And every piazzale—
It’s
raining in Florence.
We can’t go and spend our money
As we would if it were sunny,
So curl up with a book, honey—
It’s
raining in Florence.
The merchants they are frowning;
The violets are drowning
On the tomb of Elizabeth Browning—
It’s
raining in Florence.
With rain on the roof above you,
What can I do but love you—
Shall I count the ways I love you?
It’s
raining in Florence.
Water through the gutters is gushing,
Feet on the street are slushing—
The gabinetti flushing—
It’s
raining in Florence.
The door opens and PROFESSOR DUNCAN FIN enters, umbrella
in hand.)
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Rain, rain on the dusty fields
and the olive groves, collecting in barrels, dancing on cobblestone,
bathing the cab horses
with their sad noses in their feed bags, rain on the Via Tornabuoni,
rain on the Piazza della Republica, rain on the Piazza Santo Spirito,
rain on the Piazza Ognisanti, rain on the Piazza Beccheria, rain on the
English Cemetary, on the buried heart of Elizabeth Barrett Browning—rain!
Per esempio!
Per favore!
Per consequnza!
(He sits down beside the COWBOY.)
MRS. DAVOS
The rain really helps Florence,
don’t you think Mr.
Brush? It helps obscure all those heavy stones, and the umbrellas like,
black beaten tulips all along the Arno, and then the Ponte Vecchio, floating
out there in the mist as if it had been painted on a crumbling Chinese
scroll.
COWBOY
We
gaze out the window hazily:
It’s
raining on Fiesole,
The drivers are driving crazily—
It’s
raining in Florence.
It’s raining in Settignano—
On Berenson’s Settignano
And his Cinque Cento Anno—
It’s
raining in Florence.
It’s raining in Florence,
It’s coming down in torrents,
It’s raining in Florence.
(A pause.)
MRS. DAVOS
Let’s play Images, wouldn’t
that be fun? Have you ever played?
WILSON BRUSH
No, I’m not much for games.
MRS. DAVOS
It’s quite easy, really. Let’s
play. I pretend that I’m looking at something in Italy that you
know and then I describe it in terms of something else. Now, are you
ready? . . . I’m
looking at a camel with wonderful gold humps. He’s kneeling by
the water on a floor of stone, and people are flocking around him like
flies . . . What am I looking at?
WILSON BRUSH: (with great confidence)
You are looking
at the stage set of Aida at the Teatro Communale on the banks
of the Arno.
MRS. DAVOS
No, Mr. Brush, wrong water, wrong city,
wrong humps—Wrong! I’m looking at St. Mark’s in Venice .
. . Now, shall we try again? . . . I’m looking at a delicate egg-cup,
all pink and white and green, so frail it would crack if you flicked
it ever so slightly with your little finger.
WILSON BRUSH (his eyes lighting up)
That must be Giotto’s belltower.
You can’t fool me on that one. You remember what Ruskin said about it: “In
its first appeal to the strangers’s eye there is something unpleasing;
a mingling, as it seems to him, of over severity with over minuteness.”
MRS. DAVOS
Yes . . . And now this is rather different.
I’m looking at
a bloody penguin on an iceburg.
WILSON BRUSH
Well, you’ve got me there.
MRS. DAVOS
Oh, that’s easy. I’m looking
at one of those carabinieri on one of those white boxes, directing traffic.
Now let me give you something
a little more difficult.
(She leans forward in meditation. A pause.)
I am looking at Ernest Hemingway!
GLADYS DAVOS
Mother, don’t be silly. You’re
not looking at anything. Your hat has slipped down over your eyes.
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Per Favore! Per cortesia!
(A pause.)
GLADYS DAVOS
Professor Pin seems to be attacking
his idioms now . . .
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Per Bacco!
GLADYS DAVOS
Wilson, that article of yours— “Athens
on the Arno”—is the best thing we’ve had in years. You did
a bang-up job, and we’re
all grateful. You seemed to catch the spirit of the whole thing so beautifully
. . . and all those shots of the Merlini girl were just terrific.
WILSON BRUSH
Well, I did love doing it.
GLADYS DAVOS
It was wonderful.
(She beckons to Marina.)
Now we all must celebrate. What will you have? An
Americano? . . . We’ll
have three americanos.
(A pause.)
MRS. DAVOS
Ah, I do wish you’d been in Venice
with us, Mr. Brush. Venice is all so human, isn’t it? The canals
are like the vessels of the human body.
WILSON BRUSH
Yes, it must be strange to find them
frozen over in winter.
MRS. DAVOS
Like hardening of the arteries . . .
Ah, Venice is lovely, isn’t
it, Mr. Brush? It really is the flower in the buttonhole of the world,
so to speak.
WILSON BRUSH
Yes, so to speak.
MRS. DAVOS
At night the buildings along the Grand
Canal are exotic flowers explored by luminous insects, and the stars
are the beaks of pale birds
pecking the water. It’s so wonderful to be there perched on the
waves. Sometimes in the dead of night I can actually hear the mud slipping under the sea.
WILSON BRUSH
That must be an odd sensation.
MRS. DAVOS
And, the gondolas! There’s something
about the motion of a gondola, Mr. Brush, that nobody’s been able
to pin down, wouldn’t
you agree? . . . I never know which I prefer—lying in a gondola and looking
at the land or lying on the land and looking at a gondola.
(A pause.)
WAVERLY THORNE
I don’t think you’ve
heard this. It’s called “Poem.”
It’s my only poem called just poem.
HILDA DONEAPPLE
Oh, you’re so good on titles!
How do you know about those things?
WAVERLY THORNE
Instinct, I suppose.
(A pause. She Recites.)
Poem
Turning the knob,
the Nabob
enters, green
with Envy.
Thing-
a-
ma-
bob
the lob-
ster
floats
in the tureen
Watch-
fob
Corn-
cob
Green-
leaves
and no
birds sing
Whodunit?
HILDA DONEAPPLE
Oh, Waverly, that’s really sprung,
isn’t
it?
All those ob’s and een’s and in’s and un’s. Remarkable!
WAVERLY THORNE
If I have anything, it’s an
ear!
(A pause.)
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Per Esempio!
WAVERLY THORNE
If only I didn’t have to duel
so with my daemon . . .
(While the others at her table sip their drinks,
GLADYS DAVOS opens a large envelope.)
GLADYS DAVOS: (her expression changing slightly
for a moment)
Well, that’s
too bad.
WILSON BRUSH
What’s too bad?
GLADYS DAVOS
Delphine Hawkins, our Editor, says
that Florence is out.
WILSON BRUSH
Out?
MRS. DAVOS
I could have told her that to begin
with.
WILSON BRUSH
You mean my article— you mean “Athens
on the Arno”—is out? They’re not going to print it— after
all the work?
GLADYS DAVOS
Yes, Wilson, I’m afraid that’s
it . . . Delphine has decided that Florence just isn’t in at the
moment. She wants us to do Rome . . . You know, after all, as someone
said, when you go to Italy you
enter “the Ivory Gate into the Land of Dreams,” and you can’t
just enter the Ivory Gates sideways. You’ve got to go straight in.
Florence is Florence, but then it’s sort of warmed—over Rome,
isn’t
it? And in weather like this, it isn’t even warmed over. You’d
think you were in London.
MRS. DAVOS
That’s what I’ve always said.
GLADYS DAVOS
And then there’s so much going
on right now in Rome—the new movies, the new fashions—it’s all
so exciting. And then—let’s not forget the Pope.
WILSON BRUSH
I wasn’t about to forget the
Pope. In fact, I hadn’t
even thought of the Pope.
GLADYS DAVOS
Wilson, you hadn’t thought of
the Pope: there are millions and millions of people all over the world
who are thinking about the Pope at
every minute of the day and night. With Holy Year almost upon us, how
can you say such a thing? Rome is Rome, you understand.
WILSON BRUSH (blurting out)
But I will get paid,
won’t I?
GLADYS DAVOS (slowly and somewhat indignantly)
Paid?
For what?
WILSON BRUSH
For my article . . .
GLADYS DAVOS
You do understand, Wilson, that The
Medium’s policy on
this sort of thing is that you do it on speculation. We have to think
of our readers . . . we can’t accept every article that comes along
. . . And besides, the fun of something like this is in the doing isn’t
it?
PROFESSOR DUN PIN
Per piacere! Per
cortesia! Per consequenza!
GLADYS DAVOS
Mother, we must be off. Rome
awaits. Rome—and the
Ivory Gate into the Land of Dreams.
MRS. DAVOS
R. S. V. P.
GLADYS DAVOS
Well, Wilson, I wish you lots of
luck. I know you will do some wonderful thing while you’re here.
And do always keep The Medium in mind.
WILSON BRUSH
I certainly will.
GLADYS DAVOS
Good-bye.
MRS. DAVOS
Arrivederci, Mr. Brush.
(GLADYS DAVOS and MRS. DAVOS make their way to
the door. MARINA sees them out. WILSON BRUSH concentrates despondently
on his drink.)
MRS. WADDLE
Mirabelle Taft, the head of One World,
is trying to get the Mayor of Siena to have Siena secede from Italy
and join the world.
She wants it to
be the first city in Italy to recognize the boundaries of the heart . .
. Isn’t
that exciting? . . . What cantata are you betting on in the Palio, Commendatore
Facciotutto?
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO
The word is, I think,
contrada.
MRS. WADDLE
Well, that’s Italian for you,
isn’t
it?
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO
Yes, that is Italian,
Mrs. Waddle.
MRS. WADDLE
Mirabelle is hoping to have ten thousand
people from all over Europe come to Florence next month to burn their
passports in
the Piazza
Signoria—right
there where Savonarola burned all those awful things—right in front of
all those naked statues. Of course, once they’ve burned their passports,
they won’t be able to go anywhere. But they won’t have to go anywhere.
They’ll be in Florence, and they can just be.
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO
How interesting, Mrs.
Waddle.
LIVIA GADDES GELATINI
Fascinating, Mrs. Waddle.
(A pause.)
MRS. WADDLE
And how are your memoirs coming along,
Signora Gelatini?
LIVIA GADDES GELATINI
They’re not, darling.
The publishers want to pay me to go on, and other people want to pay
me to stop. I’m caught between
two fires.
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO
Peccato, cara.
LIVIA GADDES GELATINI
The editor adores the part
about my childhood on the Island of Weed off Java. You know I wore no
clothes at all
until the age of
fifteen. It’s hardly surprising that I became the plaything of three
continents and that at the mere mention of my name men in high public office
would swallow visibly and stare at their agendas . . . Yes, it’s been
a long but fascinating road—all the way from that brilliant young Marquess
of Wickerhaven to old Luigi Gaddes Gelatini.
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO
Yes, there’s certainly
not very much on his agenda.
LIVIA GADDES GELATINI
Ah, but then, Franco, yours
is always so full. . . . Of course, the editor isn’t
at all happy about the end. He’s insisting
that I go to Sicily and live in a cave and become a follower of Father
Pio—just
to give the book some sort of classical unity.
MRS. WADDLE: (glancing toward the window, from
which MARINA is drawing back the curtain)
The rain seems to be stopping.
LIVIA GADDES GELATINI
What a relief. It’s
such a bore.
(On this note MRS. CARBOY enters. She removes
her red raincape, shuts
her umbrella, and sits down purposefully with WILSON BRUSH. She opens
a copy
of The Medium,
and brandishes it before him.)
MRS. CARBOY
Such vulgarity, Mr. Brush: Think
of comparing Spanish moss to “pale
gray mop-ends worked by the wind’s fingers.” I can’t
go along with him there!
WILSON BRUSH
But I understand he’s only
eighteen.
MRS. CARBOY
I don’t care if he’s
ten. Zinnias like “frayed
tennis balls scattered at random over the lawn.”. . . And black
eyes “clicking
like castanets against white marble.”
WILSON BRUSH
Perhaps we ought to give him a chance
to develop.
MRS. CARBOY
Such comparisons make a needless
assault on one’s unconscious.
WILSON BRUSH
Oh . . .
MRS. CARBOY
It’s beyond my comprehension
how a writer like Harding Calhoun can refer to “a churchtower
poised like a surgical instrument in the blue tongue of the valley” or “the
whiplike river lashing the violet flesh of the mountain” or “an
old wall peeking over a hill.” He
may very well be writing for those thousands of women in their aluminum
beehive bonnets in those beauty parlors stretching across the deserts
of western America,
but this is not my cup of tea. Oh, every time I read
one of these new stories in The Medium I feel I want to die
. . . You’ve finished your
piece for them, I gather.
WILSON BRUSH
Yes, it’s finished . . .
in more ways than one.
MRS. CARBOY
Were they pleased?
WILSON BRUSH
Yes, they were very pleased. They’ve
thrown it out.
MRS. CARBOY
What a shame! . . . But you will
have time now to concentrate
on what you’re over here for, won’t you? . . . I
hope this doesn’t
mean that you won’t be able to take my cousin’s apartment
on the Lung’Arno?
WILSON BRUSH
I think it does. I’ve already
spent the money I was supposed to have made.
MRS. CARBOY
Oh, you poor boy . . . But you
must get out of the Americano . . . You must have a proper place to
live. You can’t go on living—existing—at
the Americano. That’s just too dismal for words . . . If you want
to take the lease, I’m sure we can arrange it somehow . . .
I’m sure Cucu
would like that, wouldn’t she?
WILSON BRUSH
Yes, of course.
MRS. CARBOY
You do have the 100,000 Lire you
were going to put down for the lease.
WILSON BRUSH
Yes.
MRS. CARBOY
Well, why don’t I put up the
other 100,000? I’d love
to do that. You wouldn’t have to think of repaying me. You could
do that somehow some time in the future. It would be a favor to me to
have you look
after the things there.
WILSON BRUSH
That’s wonderful!
(MRS. CARBOY extracts a large envelope from her
bag and puts it on the table.)
MRS. CARBOY
You know the apartment is in a building
that belonged to an ancient order known as The Sweepers. The Sisters
were allowed
the
use of
only one implement—the
broom. Hence, in the vulgar tongue their retreat became known as “The
Broom Closet.”
(She rushes ahead, savoring the sibilants.)
One sister is supposed to have swept so severely
that she dislodged a heavy stone and fell into a cistern in the cellar.
You’re supposed to hear
her when it rains.
WILSON BRUSH
How interesting!
MRS. CARBOY (indicating the envelope and extending
her cupped hand in much the same way as THE MARCHESA at the end of
ACT I)
You put your
share in
the envelope, and then I’ll put mine, and my cousin, Luisa Lampone,
will be by in a minute to pick it up and she will give you the keys.
I know you
are going to enjoy it. It’s a lovely place, and you’ll get
so much valuable work done while you’re there.
(She hands him the envelope; he deposits the money
in it, hands it back to her; she opens her purse, rummages around in
it, stuffs the envelope
and
then returns it to WILSON BRUSH. He looks at it, and puts it down on
the table in
front of him.)
MRS. CARBOY
I won’t be seeing you for a
while, Mr. Brush. I’m
leaving for Madrid. But I know you’ll love the apartment . . .
Good-bye and good luck. Luisa will be here in a moment . . . Remember,
Florence has
two gates . . . one to the past and one to the present, and that both
are always open.
(Exit MRS. CARBOY. A long pause. WILSON BRUSH
stares straight ahead, the envelope prominently before him.)
WAVERLY THORNE
Don’t talk to me about
the problem of the writer in America . . . Who knows better than I
what it’s like? I’ve worked in a laundry,
a factory, a brewery, a bindery, a bakery, a brothel . . . I’ve
kneaded, I’ve nursed, I’ve riveted, I’ve modeled, I’ve
mangled . . . And have I ever stopped writing? . . . I would come home
late at night too tired to hold my head up and I’d pound my
typewriter until my fingers were blue. And when I couldn’t afford
a typewriter, I’d pound the
floor—up and down, up and down, wringing out the secrets
of my tortured soul . . . And is there any reward? Is there any reward?
There is only one possible reward. Immortality!
(A long pause. WILSON BRUSH stares at the envelope,
which he picks up and looks at from time to time. Everyone sits meditating
intensely in
the fashion
of
the silent films.
A BEGGAR WOMAN in rags with a baby strapped to
her breast comes into the bar. She makes the round of the tables, pauses
in front of WILSON
BRUSH,
and extends
her cupped hand.)
BEGGAR WOMAN
Per il
bambino, Signore. For the
baby.
WILSON BRUSH (his mind suddenly lifted from his
preoccupations of the moment.)
What a pretty baby!
(He deposits a bill in the BEGGAR WOMAN’S
cupped hand, which shuts like a clam.)
COWBOY
The lady has a baby,
Che Bambino: What a baby!
Each day a different baby—
Florence in the spring!
(Mario shows the BEGGAR WOMAN
to the door.)
MRS. WADDLE
Sturbridge is going to speak next
Sunday, Commendatore,
on “The
Ivory Tower.” His sermon is all about certain so-called poets (glancing
in the direction of WAVERLY THORNE.) who come over to Europe on good
American taxpayers’ money and sit around in public places reciting
their poems that are filled with the most awful words, and never once
set foot
in church.
WAVERLY THORNE
I’m dedicating this new poem
to the Rector Sturbridge Waddle of the American Church. I’ve
put him into the third circle of my Inferno along with the foreign
philanderers. He’s made to urinate
perpetually at the foot of a blasted orange tree while through the smoking
azaleas his wife Thelma (She darts out her hand in the direction of MRS.
WADDLE.) calls out to him, “Sturbridge!”
HILDA DONEAPPLE
Oh, Waverly, you are savage!
WAVERLY THORNE
Here is “Italian Evening:”
Through the pock-marked evening air
Roman statues run for cover;
In a piebald village square
Operatic shadows hover;
While above a trattoria there
A huge, irate piano mover
Shakes a grand piano leg
At his bulging daughter’s lover;
Someone just across the way
Sings, “La donna e mobile!”
Fat rain clouds come racing over.
Tourists choke on vermicelli,
Voices bounce across the valley—
Roman statues take cover.
HILDA DONEAPPLE
That has a real rumble to it.
I don’t think anybody’s
even tried anything like that since Edna St. Vincent Millay.
WAVERLY THORNE
And she didn’t bring it off
. . . This is another one I’ve done in the new “controversial” style.
It doesn’t
have a title,—
Those prunes that you left
in the moonlight
on the oilcloth—
so delicious—
you thought, my big-fingered friend,
that I’d put them back
in the icebox, didn’t you?
well, I didn’t—
I put my foot in it . . .
(She breaks off.)
Hilda, you’re not listening.
HILDA DONEAPPLE (whose eyes have strayed to the
front page of the Rome Daily American, stands up with a shriek)
Waverly,
have you seen this?
(She reads in a loud, anxious voice.)
MARCHESA
HEADS STREPTOMYCIN RING
The Marchesa Vincenza Doria Della Robbia Merlini
was apprehended last night in Florence. Italian police authorities
have disclosed that she
was involved
in a highly complex confidence operation. She was also the head of a successful
band of black marketeers dealing in American hospital supplies in conjunction
with Lucky Luciano. Her daughter, Matilda (“Cucu”) Doria Della
Robbia Merlini, Florentine beauty, is reported to have fled to the Virgin
Islands in the company of Ben Benzina, wealthy playboy painter from Toothless
Gap,
Montana.
WAVERLY THORNE
Hilda Doneapple, you have the mind of a mammoth artichoke. At the mere
mention of Lucky Luciano, you see yourself already being tied up and
gagged and carted off to the White Slave Market.
HILDA DONEAPPLE
But Waverly, this isn’t just words, words, words,—the way it
is in poetry. This is the newspaper. This really happened. These were
real people. They were right here in Florence . . . Oh, my God!
MRS. WADDLE (folding her Rome Daily American)
Oh, my God!
WILSON BRUSH (folding his Rome Daily American)
OhmyGod! OhmyGod! Ohmy God!
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN (folding his Rome Daily
American)
Per Bacco!
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO (folding his Rome Daily
American)
Mamma mia!
WILSON BRUSH
Cucu . . . Cucu . . . Cucu . . . Cucu . . .
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Per carita! Per consequenza!
(A long pause. The rain has now stopped completely.
MARINA opens the door
and draws the bead curtain. WILSON BRUSH stares straight ahead in the
fashion of the silent films, opens the envelope, and extracts the contents.)
This isn’t 200,000 Lire. It’s not money
at all. It hasn’t
got numbers on it. It’s got words on it—words, words, words—headlines!
It’s strips of the Rome Daily American.
(He stares straight ahead as if paralyzed, then picks up the strips
of paper and throws them wildly into the air.)
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Dove sono io? Io sono in questa scuola.
WILSON BRUSH
What was it Mrs. Carboy said? We all belong there . . . in the Straw
Market . . . all bits of straw woven together for the briefest moment
in infinity, and then flung away before the wind . . . (He throws a few
more pieces into the air.)
or left to rot in the rain.
(He stares straight ahead, then goes berserk and throws more strips
of the Rome Daily American like confetti around the room.)
I’ve been Murpheyed . . . flimflammed
. . . the Old Cloth Trick . . .
(He sits back down and holds his head in his hands.)
Oh, my God! . . . My life . . . my love . . . my money!
(Finally grasping the reality of the situation,
he rushes madly from the bar.)
MARINA (watching him depart)
Sono pazzi, gli Americani, tutti pazzi . . . Crazy!
LIVIA GADDES GELATINI (loud enough for all to hear)
I hear that Hortensia Carboy and Luisa Lampone are off to Madrid . . . Some young American has, I understand, paved the way.
COMMENDATORE FACCIOTUTTO
They always do, don’t they, Livia? Thank God for God’s country.
(Enter AN AMERICAN TOURIST, who slowly makes
his way to the table vacated by WILSON BRUSH. HE is followed by
a BLACK MARKETEER, who makes the
round of the café.)
BLACK MARKETEER (softly in all directions)
Sigarette americane! Sigarette americane!
COWBOY
American, go home!
You may wish to roam,
But Yankee . . . go home!
American, go home!
You’ll lose all your foldin’ money
On the Via Tornabuoni,
You’ll fall for every phony—
American, go home!
BLACK MARKETEER (to AMERICAN TOURIST)
Sigarette, Signore?
(He sits down.)
You like Firenze, Signore? Florence,
great city—City of Flowers; that’s what mean Florence.
Florence—she have two gates—one to the past and one
to the present. Both gates always open.
AMERICAN TOURIST
Yes, it’s a great city, all right.
BLACK MARKETEER
You see the Duomo, nice Duomo, eh? You see the Ghiberti doors, eh? Gold
doors—beautiful doors—how you like to try to open those
doors?
(A pause.)
I show you something you never seen. Something
that open other doors—that open the ivory gate to the land of dreams.
(He gestures to the door.)
It was right there that
Dante beheld Beatrice and it was the beginning for him of a new life
. . . a new life
. . .
(The bead curtain parts, and TUTU MARTINI, like Venus on her shell,
stands against the light. All lustre she seems, her luminous hair held
by invisible pins of mother-of-pearl, her lovely body, wrapped in a translucent
sheath, arched slightly forward in readiness to move, to leap, to dance.
She leans toward the AMERICAN TOURIST.)
TUTU MARTINI
You are American, aren’t you?
AMERICAN TOURIST (taken aback)
Yes, how could you have known?
TUTU MARTINI
A little bird must have told me . . . Shall we sit down?
(They sit. The BLACK MARKETEER retires to the background, beaming down
upon them.)
AMERICAN TOURIST
And you are Florentine?
TUTU MARTINI
Yes.
COWBOY
The con men have been
In operation longer;
They’re wiser, they’re stronger,
American, go home!
AMERICAN TOURIST
But you speak such wonderful English.
TUTU MARTINI
I had an English grandmother. Everyone in Florence speaks English . . .
COWBOY
Someone or other
Has an English grandmother,
An American brother,—
Brother, go home!
TUTU MARTINI
I am Caterina Martini . . . Tutu Martini . . .
PROFESSOR DUNCAN PIN
Dove siamo noi? Noi siamo in questa scuola.
TUTU MARTINI
I think I could learn to like you in no time at all.
AMERICAN TOURIST
How wonderful . . . Tutu Martini . . . Tutu . . . Tutu . . . Tutu . . . Tutu . . .
(As the lights dim, the COWBOY makes his way to
the door, singing:
Florence in the spring
Is such a lovely thing
It makes you want to sing—
Florence in the spring!)
CURTAIN
Contributor’s
notes
Preface
Introduction by Henry Taylor
Synopsis and Production Notes
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