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LARRY LEVISElegy with a Thimbleful of Water in the Cage
It's a list of what I cannot touch: Some dandelions & black eyed susans growing
back, like innocence Over an abandoned labor camp south of Piedra; And the oldest trees, in that part of Paris with a name I forget, And beneath such quiet, a woman with a cane, And knowing, if I came back, I could not find them again; And a cat I remember who slept on the burnished mahogany The iron grillwork, the way you had to pass your letter over him In New Hampshire, the gray fur stirring a little as he inhaled; The small rural post office growing smaller, then lost, tucked Country music from a lone radio in an orchard there. ~ And those who slipped out of their names, as if called To be called: Stavros lecturing from his bequeathed chair at the Cafe Midi, Above the traffic on Olive, asking if we knew what happened After Petronius had swept the grains of sand from it, how, Granted eternal life, she had forgotten to
ask for youth, & so, And the centuries passed, she finally Became so tiny they had to put her into a jar, at which point And at which point she began to suffocate In the jar, suffocate without being able to die, until, finally, Its hue like an overcast sky & revealing even less— Into his pocket, & sold it on the docks
at Piraeus to a shop owner On a side street just off Onmonios Square, not to possess her, But to protect her from pedestrians, & the
boys of Athens rattled "Sibyl, Sibyl, what do you want?"—each
generation having to The faintest whispered rasp from the small bitter seed Remark passing through time, "I want to die!" As time passed & she Their ears against the cage to hear her, And then one day the voice became too faint, no one could hear it, The story. And then it wasn't a story, it was only an empty cage Noise of traffic, &, from the Square itself,
blaring from loudspeakers, That went on half the night, & the intermittent
music of strip shows And then, Stavros said, the sun shone straight through the cage. You could see there was nothing inside it, he said, unless you noticed Imperceptibly there, though the street was hot, windless; or unless The small mirror above the thimbleful of water, which of course Like the voice that went on whispering ceaselessly its dry rage Without listeners. He said that even if anyone heard it, As anything human. He would lie awake, the only boy in Athens who Still heard it repeating its wish to die, & he
was not surprised Began to fill with German officers, or when the loudspeakers Shattered into a thousand pieces. As the years passed, as even the sunlight began to seem Of the Midi, he began to lose interest in stories, & to
speak Never of things. Then he began to come in less frequently, & when
he did, Along the boulevards in winter the bare limbs of the trees Only the bare limbs of trees, no girl stepped into them Rumors of Stavros following the gypsy pentacostalists into Glossalalia, he once said, which was all speech, & none. In a way, it didn't matter anymore. Something
in time was fading— Or buy drugs from the two ancient boys expressionless as lizards By summer the city parks had grown dangerous. No one went there anymore to drink wine, dance, & listen Seemed once, the bitter, cleansing angel released at last from what Wasn't any angel after all. The times had changed. It became There was a law against it now, a law against gathering at night Said was forbidden for us to do, but it came to the same thing. Or to decide for yourself, Whether there was an angel inside you, or whether there wasn't. ~ Poverty is what happens at the end of any story, including this one, When you can believe in all of them, & so
believe in none; The swirl of wood grain in the desk, is it the face of an angel, or After she has decided to turn herself Into a tree? (It was a rainy afternoon, & her
van skidded at sixty; So solemn as it did then, widening before her.) Or is it Misfortune itself, or the little grimace the woman There, then not there, then there again? Or is the place where all the comparisons, the little comforts ~ What do you do when nothing calls you anymore? When the angel fasting inside you has grown so thin it flies Knowing it, & the water dries up in its thimble, & the
one swing Almost endless, swaying? ~ I'm going to stare at the whorled grain of wood in this desk I'm going to make it talk, I'm going to make it Confess everything. I was about to ask you if you were cold, if you wanted a sweater, Because
. . . Before he began one of those Stories that seemed endless, the sun pressing against Just beyond them, this could take a while; ____
the iron grillwork, into the irretrievable. Contributor's
notes
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