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       DAVID HUDDLE 
      The Mayor of Glory River 
      Was a dog that made them laugh--named Copacetic, 
        Muhammad, Sam, Federal   Government,  
        Nicodemus, Doctor Pepper, Blackie, 
        Mayor Dog, Mississippi,   Winston 
        Churchill, whatever name came to mind 
        when the dog was around: It   came to me 
        to use this joke in my dissertation-- 
        the legendary many-named   cur  
        embodying a contemptuous attitude 
        toward authority tacitly  
        shared   by residents of Glory River, 
        a convergence of Appalachian humor,  
        dialect,   and the shared values peculiar 
        to their micro-region. The impulse to name  
        and to improvise laconically  
        seemed to me so purely Anglo-American  
        that when the idea struck, I imagined--  
        as clearly as if I’d already   written them--  
        fifty brilliant pages published  
        as the lead essay in the   Journal  
        of Appalachian Studies. 
                       I want   to 
        show you something about this dog, Joe Lee 
        Liggins told   me during my interview 
        with him outside Collins’s Shell Station 
        one   afternoon. Joe Lee stood, put his hands 
        in his pockets and as he whistled a   soft 
        ditty while smiling slyly at me, aimed  
        a quick, hard kick at the   Mayor’s head. The dog  
        had been lying at our feet, as if to listen 
        to our   conversation, but he seemed not  
        at all surprised--as I most certainly   was-- 
        by the sudden assault of Joe Lee’s foot. At  
        the exact moment   necessary not  
        to be where the boot would have struck, he stood. 
        Rising to   his four feet, the Mayor seemed calm 
        and not at all insulted. He stretched   in that 
        canine way, a bow that appears to mock 
        whoever witnesses   it-- 
                    which bow led 
        Joe Lee to pivot and direct   another kick 
        at the Mayor’s tail-becrested butt, but  
        the dog sat, again   casually but at just 
        the moment to evade the kick by the width 
        of one of   his whiskers. Then the Mayor  
        scratched and licked himself, as if his   safety 
        were not an issue. 
                   Do you see what I   mean? 
        Joe Lee asked me. 
                I knew what I’d seen,   yet 
I doubted it. I’m not superstitious,  
and so to me the dog’s evasions   were 
        remarkable coincidences that appeared 
        miraculous but weren’t. The   dog’s yawning  
        and curling up again at our feet as Joe Lee 
        took his seat   on a Pepsi crate made him seem 
        all the more ordinary. The Mayor was   wiry 
        and coal black except for white on his chest, 
        a sort of   greyhound-great-Dane-labrador, 
        a large enough animal that his back 
        was   about the height of my hip bone 
        when I stood but delicate as a deer 
        or   panther--and evidently sweet-natured. 
        True, he had amber eyes in his   block-like  
        head and these gave him a hound-from-hell look, 
        but his   general demeanor was cheerful, 
        friendly, solicitous, which is to say 
        that   even with what I’d witnessed, I’d have sworn 
        he was your normal dog, basic as   weather, 
        weeds, or oatmeal. 
                  Should I fetch the   shotgun  
        and show you the same thing again? Joe Lee   asked, 
        but I waved my hand and said no, no, I  
        understood the lesson he’d   taught me. This must 
        have been what Joe Lee wanted me to say-- 
        he smiled,   nodded, sat down, took a dip of snuff, 
        leaned back on his crate, crossed his   arms, and waited 
        for me to continue interviewing him. 
        And I must say that   the people I met 
        in Glory River spoke freely and at some 
        length, as if   they wanted to explain how 
        in that place they had become the people  
        they   were.  Murders, unusually random violence,  
        incest, thefts, car wrecks,   hatred, rage, 
        strange loyalties, anarchy, paranoia, 
        irrational fears,   prejudice--it all had a kind  
        of meaning to them, a logic that became  
        more and more evident to me the longer  
        I stayed among them, the more I   listened 
        to the stories they told. I sometimes thought 
        I’d begun to see   the world as they saw 
        it, and so I’d be doomed to live in that 
        valley,   where a dog was the resident 
        magician, witch doctor, and messiah, 
        where   the fiery death of Sarah Jean Kinney 
        and her mother was mostly what   everybody 
        wanted to talk about, and where if you lived 
        there long enough   you grew to be unfit 
        to live anywhere else. 
                       Joe   Lee Liggins 
        was a classic citizen--Pepsi crate pundit, 
        a veritable   campaign manager, 
        happy to glorify the Mayor all day,  
        if I wanted to   listen and take notes while 
        the Mayor himself licked his genitalia. 
        Joe   Lee claimed that Deetum Dunford was the first 
        to meet the Mayor, and for some   months people 
        thought the dog belonged to Deetum, who called 
        him Catfish. Deetum said he’d been fishing 
        with no luck throughout a long   afternoon, 
        was about to give it up and go home  
        and fix himself a   mayonnaise sandwich, 
        when of a sudden Catfish just kind of 
        appeared beside   him, lying down right there 
        in the grass and observing Deetum’s line 
        and   bobber out in the water. Before Deetum 
        had time to wonder where the dog had   come from, 
        he started catching smallmouth bass, one 
        after another, as fast   as he could reel them in, 
        bait his hook, and throw the line out   again. 
        There on the riverbank, it was that last  
        swatch of daylight just   before it’s too dark  
        for a fisherman to see what he’s doing, 
        but Deetum   says he caught his whole stringer 
        full of bass in maybe fifteen minutes.  
        Then the dog followed him home--or what Deetum 
        called home, which is what   you and I would call 
        camp. Worried about having too many fish 
        to eat,   Deetum couldn’t stand to let good 
        food go to waste, but he needn’t have   worried 
        because the dog was happy to gnash down 
        those lard fried filets,   too. They finished off 
        all the fish that evening. 
                        Deetum thought he had 
        himself a dog, a real fine fishing dog,  
        but the   Mayor was gone the next morning, 
        and Deetum didn’t see him again until  
        two days later, by himself as usual,  
        fishing at the same spot and   catching  
        nothing whatsoever until there 
        the dog was again, lying in the   grass beside 
        him, studying the line and bobber out 
        in the water. Then   just like that, the fish 
        started biting so fast and hard it was  
        like they   wanted to jump out of the water  
        and into Deetum’s lap. 
                     Leena Grimes was 
        the next one to get a visit from the dog, 
        and she   called him Midnight because that’s 
        about when he appeared on her front   porch. 
        It was July, a hot spell when everybody 
        had trouble sleeping, but   Leena never much 
        minded weather like that, she enjoyed 
        sitting on her   porch glider deep into 
        the early hours of the morning, just   gently 
        touching a toe down every once in a while 
        to make the thing sway   back and forth, half  
        asleep and feeling like she had one foot 
        in a dream,   the other right there in Glory 
        River. Then she noticed what she first   thought 
        a shadow but was in fact a black dog lying 
        on the porch close   enough to bite her ankle 
        if he’d wanted to. Though she’d never seen 
        him   before, she said he had the feel and manner 
        of a dog that might have belonged   to her 
        for a long time--so she just spoke to him 
        that way. Hello,   Midnight, she said she said. 
        The animal lifted its head and stared  
        at her as if to say, What do you want? 
        During my interview with   Leena, she 
        admitted that she’d always loved magic, 
        and so she didn’t trust   herself in thinking 
        that finally she’d gotten her deepest 
        wish, a dog that   could change her bad luck. 
        Because Leena’s story was one of the saddest 
        I   heard in all my time in Glory River, 
        a husband who’d been killed by a drunk   driver, 
        a son who was in jail for bootlegging-- 
        a bootlegger stupid enough   to get caught--  
        and a daughter who walked the streets--those were  
        Leena’s words, walked the streets--of Baltimore. 
      That was the morning the dog got his title. 
        In his high-stepping, royal   dog manner,  
        he walked beside Leena to the Post Office, 
        where Robert   Alley, sitting on the steps 
        out there, touched the brim of his Blue Seal   cap 
        and said, Good morning, Leena, I see you’re 
        walking with   the Mayor this morning. Leena 
        said she both knew and didn’t know what   Robert 
        was talking about, but it amused her, so that 
        she was giggling when   she went in to ask  
        for her mail. That was when Elwood told her there 
        was   a letter she’d have to sign for before 
        he could give it to   her. 
                        Leena never told what 
        came to her in that   envelope--like most 
        Glory River people, she was perfectly 
        open about not   revealing the crucial 
        details of some stories. All she would say   was 
        They found land on my property, and the phrase  
        pleased her   mightily when she said it. 
                                     You’d   have 
        thought Leena would have moved out of the valley-- 
        evidently she came   into a lot of money, 
        because she fixed up her house higgeldy- 
        piggeldy, as   is the way among those people, 
        had indoor plumbing installed, added a room   here, 
        a room there, and painted it the gaudiest 
        shade of lavender she   could find. She said 
        she wouldn’t dream of leaving Glory River, 
        it was a   rough place to live, and she knew 
        it wasn’t going to change, but it was home  
        for her. She commissioned Dude Dunford  
        to construct a palatial dog   house 
        in the side yard, and when it was finished, 
        she went to considerable   trouble to persuade 
        the Mayor to live in it. The dog sometimes  
        dropped   by for one of Leena’s snacks, and she said 
        that in the course of time he’d   peed on all four  
        corners of his mansion but that he’d made it 
        clear to   her that the place didn’t suit him. 
        She confessed that the Mayor never sat  
        with her on the porch again. 
                            Baron Gomes   was 
        who he took up with next, a white boy thought  
        to have been fathered   by Eddie Crockett, one 
        of the few black men who could stand to live 
        in   Glory River. Baron Gomes’s skin 
        was notably darker than anybody  
        else’s   in his family, the Crocketts 
        and the Gomeses lived next door to each   other, 
        and so the story of his conception, 
        a narrative of how it could   have happened 
        between Baron’s mother and Eddie Crockett-- 
        maybe their   paths crossed on a summer afternoon 
        when they were both out picking   berries-- 
        sprang to the mind of anybody from Glory 
        River who looked Baron   in the face. The boy had 
        grown up hearing sly comments from grown-ups 
        and   crude taunts from his schoolmates. So it was 
        an ongoing explosive   situation 
        in the valley, because race isn’t  
        an easy topic where feuds and   killings 
        are common as Sunday dinner and insults 
        spark quarrels that last   generations. 
        But these particular flames never caught  
        because Baron was a   sweet child, and his mother 
        had died when he was in first grade. So he’d   learned 
        to navigate in a world where he met 
        hostility and contempt along   with 
        pity, sentiment, and plain old low down,  
        gossipy   curiosity. 
                   Baron’s problems  
        were school--which bored   him--and his body-- 
        which had grown faster than he could keep up with. 
        At   twelve years old, Baron was six feet two 
        but comic-book skinny, so that he   couldn’t 
        walk to the store without tripping over his 
        size twelve   shoes. 
                One morning the Mayor blocked  
        his way, and when   Baron tried to step around 
        him, the Mayor was instantly back 
        in his way   again. Gotta get to school,  
        damn dog, Baron said aloud,   though he didn’t  
        really care--but then he found himself--on a cool 
        frosty   Autumn morning--in this strange dance 
        with a demon dog. The boy must have   thought 
        he was in a dream, because the animal bumped 
        him lightly or nudged   him, then dodged or just 
        disappeared only to appear again behind Baron 
        or   to the side, as if it meant to teach him 
        a certain way to move his body. Then somehow 
        Baron understood that he’d been challenged 
        to a race--he and   the Mayor took off  
        toward the schoolhouse, and Baron later said 
        it felt   like he was somewhere between flying 
        and floating. The Mayor barely beat   him 
        to the door, into which Baron Ducked, after 
        which he looked back out   the window, but the dog 
        was nowhere to be seen. Baron’s senses 
        were still   elevated when classes began, 
        which made him pay attention in spite 
        of his   old habits. And the Mayor was there 
        to meet him again when school was   out--the two  
        of them raced again, out to field beyond 
        Baron’s house,   where again the Mayor  
        took up the game of block and dodge that   required 
        Baron to move his feet so quickly that he’d 
        have been mocked and   humiliated if there’d 
        been anybody there to see the dance the dog 
        was   teaching him. 
                Within two weeks Baron Gomes 
was Glory   River Elementary’s finest 
        athlete and best student, though a meanness 
        came   up in him that he explained to me 
        in our interview. Do you know what   that dog 
        did to me the last time I saw him? Bit me! 
        I   don’t mean he nipped me. He sank his teeth  
        in right here. Baron showed me the scars 
        on the thick muscle just below his   thumb. 
        God damn thing bit me! And then just walked 
        on off   and wouldn’t have anything else 
        to do with me. 
              There were too many tales 
of the Mayor’s deeds for me to tell you 
all of   them. Shep Ogden never liked the dog, 
        claimed it hexed his cat so that it   peed 
        on the furniture. Robbie Pickens said 
        the dog got him lost up on   Dalton Mountain 
        and then disappeared. Jack Mabe confessed 
        that the dog   sat beside him all one night  
        at the poker game down by the river, Jack   won 
        more money that anybody ever had  
        in the long history of Glory River   card 
        games, but then the next night the dog wasn’t 
        there, and Jack lost   all he’d won and then some. 
        Lila Schnell said the dog helped her get   pregnant. 
        Deetum Dunford told about Elmer Clemons 
        offering a two hundred   dollar reward 
        to anybody who’d shoot the Mayor, 
        but they had to bring   Elmer the carcass 
        to prove they’d done it. All over the Valley 
        men took   out their shotguns, and a fair 
        number of them claimed to have shot the   dog 
        point blank, only to find no carcass where 
        they’d seen him fall or   else to see him get up, 
        and scratch the dirt behind him like he’d  
        taken a   leak and trot on off. 
                             This was  
        years ago   that I did my field work, wrote 
        my dissertation, the publication 
        of which   led so many universities  
        to offer me jobs. More than once I’ve   thought 
        that I owe my own good fortune to the Mayor 
        of Glory River. At   first I thought this to be 
        the proper way of things--after all, I did 
        the   work, I saw the symbolic possibility 
        in the dog, I shaped my writing   shrewdly, 
        I followed the highest professional 
        standards.  
          It is only now that I  
        approach retirement that I am besieged 
        with   doubt--and why say doubt when it is 
        near certainty? Even if I saw it 
        with   my own eyes, there was no such dog. 
        My interviewees lied to me. I   was 
        grandly hornswoggled. Glory River had 
        its fun with me. And my   university 
        doesn’t want to hear that its Distinguished  
        Professor of   Cultural Studies is 
        a consummate fool. Personally, 
        however, I’m old   enough to understand  
        what a gift it was those years ago when  
        the people   of Glory River took me in.  
        Which is to say that I welcome the black  
        dog   that sometimes races through my dreams.    
                Contributor’s
          notes
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